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The Zoo 4: Stomachs
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The Zoo 4 - Stomachs (Disk 2 of 2).adf
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Frontier.ade
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1978-03-08
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*!EOM
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0919Y00F05prime09Y00C6NFRONTIER WAS POOR
0819Y00F05prime08Y00C1NFishboy of Panda
0816Y00F07pcclone08N
0806Y00C2NI hated Frontier and if you liked it then I hate you too.
0801N
0801NLets examine frontier in detail shall we? Lets try to decide what deviant
0801Nfreak would want to play a "game" SO COMPLETELY DULL.
0801N
0811Y00C5Y11C2NCOMBAT BIT: No. Its so bad I can't think of anything to write. Instead here
0801Nis an appropriate quote from esteemed horror writer H.P. Lovecraft:
0806Y00C4N"Nothing I could say could even adumbrate the loathsome, un-holy, non-human,
0801Nextra-galactic horror and hatefulness and ununtterable evil of that forbidden
0801Nspawn..."
0806Y00C2NYeah, that just about sums it up, from H.P. Lovecrafts lesser known work:
0806Y00C4N"Why can't I shoot the fucker without autopilot on?"
0801N
0811Y00C5Y13C2NSTRATEGY BIT: Buy something from somewhere. Sell it somewhere else. OHHH! OH!
0801NOH! OHHHHHHHH! Once again only H.P. Lovecraft can truly describe:
0806Y00C4N"...singular whistling noises and collosal footprints..."
0801NCheers.
0801N
0811Y00C5Y06C2NSOUND: Take it away Mr Lovecraft:
0806Y00C4N"From even the greatest of horrors irony is seldom absent"
0801N
0811Y00C5Y10C2NGRAPHICS: Lovecraft:
0806Y00C4N"There was a horrible brittleness and dry fragments were scaling off"
0806Y00C2N
0801NWhy play frontier? A game that lacks any excitment, intrigue or gameplay. A
0801Ngames so bad you have to ask for PERMISSION TO TAKE OFF.
0801N
0816Y39C1Y43C5Y47C2NAlso: I've seen Star Wars and space is NOT blue. No fucking way...
0801N
0811Y31C7Y42C2NBut what I really hate. I mean REALLY HATE, are those people who tell
0801NFRONTIER ANNECDOTES... AKKK! CUNTS! They go like this: "Well I was flying a
0801NPanther Clipper right, and I thought 'hey! I'll blow this Space Station up'.
0801NSo I stood shooting at the space station for four hours, then I thought:
0801N'Hey! I guess they don't blow up!' Ha Ha Ha Ha!"
0801N
0914Y00F05prime09NOh just fuck off and die.
*!EOF